It’s His Problem
Several years ago, while teaching at Faulkner, our Life of Christ class was discussing the Sermon on the Mount. We read Matthew 5:27-28: “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” I pointed out to the class – mostly freshmen – that women also have a responsibility to dress in a way that does not provoke lustful thoughts in the minds and hearts of men.
One student, writing in some assigned work, that she believed it was the man’s responsibility to control his thoughts. We have since heard women make a similar statement – “I do not dress to cause lustful thoughts. I dress because it is comfortable, etc… It is his problem if he can’t control his thoughts.”
At the bottom of this student’s paper, I wrote something to this effect: “If I knew I was doing something that made you mad, that caused you to lose your temper, would it be morally acceptable to respond, ‘It’s your problem. You have to control your temper. I don’t do… to make you mad.’ Is that acceptable?”
She did not respond but perhaps she thought about it. God made the male to be stimulated visually. God made the female to be stimulated through tactile affections. When you put the two together in the marriage commitment, you have the recipe for a positive, physical relationship.
But, as with every thing else God has created, man corrupts God’s beauty and turns it into something else. Thus, we have women (and men, too) who show off their bodies in ways that ought to be reserved for the privacy of the bedroom. I fail to see how putting sand beneath your feet or a water slide beneath your bottom makes it morally justified to walk around in nothing more than your underwear. If men are present, the stakes are the same.
Yes, men have a responsibility to keep their minds as pure as they can (Matt. 5:8). Yes, there are men who will have impure thoughts, regardless how women may dress. Peter says some men have “eyes full of adultery” (2 Peter 2:14). Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:23).
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But, women also have a responsibility not to lay a stumbling-block before their male counterparts. Later in Matthew, 18:6-7, Jesus says, “whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe to the world because of its stumbling blocks! For it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come; but woe to that man [or woman] through whom the stumbling block comes!”
Some shorts and skirts are too short. Some dresses are too tight. Some blouses and tops are too low. Bikinis are no more acceptable to wear in the presence of men than panties are.
Men have a responsibility. Women also have a responsibility. Rather than showing our bodies off, we should be more concerned about expressing our Christ-like spirit (1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Peter 3:4).
Paul Holland
