If you were to meet a young man and dated him, how would you react if you learned he wanted to be a preacher? Good. But, I would have to mentally prepare to move around. You might not have as deep relationships with people because you might move. But, you also get to make friends with many people. It is good to meet visitors at church. It has been fun to move to new places and meet new people, but thankfully we did stay in Romania (7 years) and in Kentucky (6 years) a good amount of time.
There can be pressure in being a preacher’s wife – that would be my initial reaction. But, then I would think, “sweet.” It is fun to make food and take it to people and to visit the hospital.
Though details differ, our stories share remarkably smilier narratives: At some point, our parents made the conscious sacrifice to serve God and His people, but we were involuntarily born to share the burden of our parents’ ministry – way before we were prepared to do so (pg. 58). No, it has not been a burden to be a PK. I’m an introvert and not comfortable meeting new people, but it is something Christians should do. I love having people over to our house to visit and share a meal.
No one has been critical of mom and dad. Dad is organized so he doesn’t feel the stress of working on a sermon Saturday night. There have been times when we have to wait around after worship while Dad talks and visits but that’s not often so it’s not a big deal.
The parents poured out their ministry woes to their three sons. Whatever mean things the church folks said or did, the boys heard about it. And it broke their hearts. Mom and Dad do not talk about issues at church. In fact, Rachel and I have rarely talked negatively about anyone in front of the girls but we have rarely felt the need to talk negatively about anyone anyway!
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Do you feel that you have ever had to compete with Dad’s time and attention compared with the church? No. Our family has always spent time together, doing things. Even church activities like Monday Night for the Master are fun.
One thing that stands out in stark contrast between Ms. Lee’s article and our own experiences is the contrast between the denominational structure and the organization of the church in the New Testament. A body of (godly) elders makes all the difference. I have been blessed with good men as elders in all the churches where I have worked and they have not only made my work as a preacher easier but, as you can see, they have also made life a blessing for two PKs.
Christ needs more full-time workers in His kingdom. Don’t let the life of a preacher keep you from this choice. It can have great benefits for your family.
–Paul Holland
