“For I do not understand what I am doing, because I do not practice what I want to do, but I do what I hate. Now if I do what I do not want to do, I agree with the law that it is good. So now I am no longer the one doing it, but it is sin living in me. For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh. For the desire to do what is good is with me, but there is no ability to do it. For I do not do the good that I want to do, but I practice the evil that I do not want to do… What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” (Romans 7:15-19,24)
Eric Whitacre is one of the most talented and remarkable chorale composers of the 21st century. He has constructed innovative pieces that have quickly become masterpieces that will far outlive him. One of his biggest successes is the song “When David Heard,” a heartbreaking recount of the moment King David learned of the death of his son, Absalom. Using clashing chords, whispering, and dissonance, he fills the listeners with unease and longing, as the words prick the heart. There is a point, right at the climax of the song, where you desperately want to fix the dissonant notes to bring resolution and harmony. The dissonance seems to reverberate deep inside of you, echoing painfully in your head.
Dissonance is a fascinating musical effect. By placing notes together that clash, you spark in the audience a nearly tangible desire to raise a note or change something to make the sound stop. In many ways, this accurately describes the struggle of our Christian walk, does it not? There is a melody that our flesh and its lusts are playing in our heart–a song of selfishness, passion, and indulgence. It causes a longing for the world that often works as a siren’s song, luring us into sin. By contrast, there is a song played by our soul. It is strummed by the fingerprints of the divine left on our soul, and it calls out for something more, something greater. The dissonance screams within us as these two sounds clash and fight for resolution. If left unchecked, it will tear even the strongest heart apart… So what are we to do?
The answer is to listen for a new sound, a song that is played in the presence of God’s beauty. As Christians, we have unfettered access to the presence of God, and if we use it, we can find the dissonance inside us resolved. God’s grace will bring harmony to the lusts of the flesh, and His beauty will fulfill the strumming of God’s fingerprints. But how are we to find this escape and freedom in the beauty of God?
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For starters, we need to ensure we have a mind that is open and willing to see what God is doing. Often, Satan achieves victories by allowing our mindset to be predisposed to the negative, constantly looking for the bad. If we live our lives looking at the world through the lens of darkness, there will be no way for us to find the light of God. We as Christians are called to discipline ourselves and work to keep our mind clear and open to find God’s light. But this is not enough–we also need to be willing to examine ourselves and the world honestly. We have a tendency to romanticize or glorify the world and its pleasures, making it far more tempting than it actually is. If we take a moment and look at it carefully, it will not bring us joy, but sadness. We will see a world that is striving for resolution and harmony, but failing to find it. We will see people who are pursuing purpose or reason, but always coming up empty. But this does not have to be us–we have purpose, we have reason, and we have resolution, all seen on the cross of Calvary.
The choice now comes to you. There is a dissonance inside of you that is reaching a fever pitch. It is tearing at you and dragging you in opposite directions. There is only one way to bring harmony to the conflict and resolution from the clashing: living in the presence of God’s beauty. Find your way into it today.
Bishop Darby
