Dr. David Burns, in Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, had claimed that all depression is caused by distorted thinking. It is easy to take exception to that statement. There are very real problems in life, like bankruptcy or poverty, old age and its attendant circumstances, physical disabilities (especially chronic pain), terminal illnesses, or death.
Yet, there is a difference between experiencing sadness over these issues (which is normal and even healthy), and depression, which, while often typical, is not normal. Sadness results from losses or disappointments that are not distorted. Depression goes beyond the normal to distorted thinking.
Let’s talk about some of these life events that cause sadness but ought not to cause depression…
Life (health) – The feelings that result from a terminal diagnosis can run the gamut from anger, sadness, frustration, and guilt. Depression sets in when we reflect on what we cannot do because we will not live long enough to do it. Depression sets in when we define ourself, our value, by what we can’t do. But, surely you can see by now, that this is a distortion. We can still choose to live life to its fullest with what time we have left (Ecc. 5:18-20).
Maiming – The same thinking will apply if we were to get into a severe accident that left us maimed. We can adjust our expectations to life and not get depressed which hinders our effectiveness to our Lord.
Loss of a job – Again, let us not fall into the trap of defining ourselves almost entirely by our jobs, our roles in our jobs, or our roles in a particular task at our jobs. If we fail in any of those, it does not have to drastically impact our thinking if we see ourselves as servants of Jehovah God and Jesus Christ (Col. 3:23-24).
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Loss of a loved one – This is one of the hardest to deal with. The fact of the matter is that we weren’t designed to live here forever. We are physical and we will put off the physical body (Ecc. 3:2; Heb. 9:27). The depression comes in when a death of a loved one occurs (like a child) and we blame ourselves for that tragedy.
But then we have to ask ourselves such questions as: Can I predict the future? Can I predict what someone else is going to do or how they are going to behave? Can I read minds? We must simply accept death as a natural part of life and adjust and continue moving forward.
One other point… Regardless of what causes our sadness on earth, there will be none in heaven: Revelation 7:17; 21:4.
We can (and will) be sad; that’s a part of life. But we don’t have to allow it to degenerate into depression. “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful” (John 14:27). Mark that verse in your Bible. Write it on an index card and tape it to your mirror. Memorize it.
Paul Holland
