Alexander Rodriguez (sometimes called “A-Rod”) is a third baseman and shortstop for the Yankees. He’s been named an All-Star 14 times and has won numerous awards. He has/had a record $275 million contract. But Rodriguez has been in the news a lot lately because of his use of performance enhancing drugs (“PED”s).
As far back as at least 2007, he was denying (in an interview with Katie Couric) that he used PEDs. But the evidence mounted and in February 2009, Rodriguez admitted to using steroids. He was also caught up in a scandal in 2013 dealing with PEDs. He was suspended by the Major League from 211 games that year but was allowed to play, pending an appeal. Eventually, the suspension was reduced to only 162 games, sidelining him for the entire 2014 season.
His use of PEDs had drastically hurt his relationship with his teammates. Some even dubbed him “A-Fraud.”
Recently, Rodriguez wrote a two-page letter with his own hand, apologizing to all the relevant people. One statement he made in the letter was this: “I accept the fact that many of you will not believe my apology or anything that I say at this point. I understand why and that’s on me” (usatoday.com).
At the end of the letter, “Alex” wrote: “When I go to spring training, I will do everything I can to be the best player and teammate possible, earn a spot on the Yankees and help us win.”
When you destroy your credibility, what do you do to rebuild it?
Bringing the question home, if you hurt your credibility with your spouse, children, close friends, the church, or co-workers, how do you rebuild it?
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Put simply, you have to go out of your way to show that you are serious about being honest from now on. If you are trying to put drug use or alcohol use behind you, you have to keep your cabinets open to your family. You have to tell them all your hiding places and keep them open and accessible. If you have the urge to drink, immediately tell your spouse/friend and get distracted doing something else.
If you are trying to put pornography use behind you, you need to put computer filters on your computer without knowing the password. You have to keep your computer open and accessible to others. Your spouse/friend needs to know about your weakness and you need to communicate when you are being tempted.
If you are trying to put an adulterous affair behind you, you have to strengthen your relationship with your spouse and go out of your way to keep your free-time open and accessible to him/her. Change where you go. Change your friends. Do what it takes.
If you are trying to put lying behind you, you have to go out of your way to continue strengthening your word. With all of these sins, you have to be patient with those you’ve offended who may find it hard to trust you as easily as you think they should. It may take months, even years, for the offended person to trust you again. You’ve got to be patient with that fact and accept it – after all, you’re the one who destroyed the foundation of trust.
Relationships cannot be sustained if trust is not there. Work on it.
–Paul Holland
