First, the Bible: “Now the word of the Lord came to Jonah the second time, saying “Arise, go to Nineveh the great city and proclaim to it the proclamation which I am going to tell you” (Jonah 3:1-2).
Jonah did not want to do what his Father told him to do. In fact, he ran in the opposite direction of responsibility. So, to use modern terminology, God put Jonah in a “time-out” chair. The time-out chair typically serves as a tool for punishment, separating a disobedient child from his or her siblings, toys, or whatever else that might give them joy. The child is usually in the time-out chair for some specified length of time.
When God Jonah into “time-out,” it was in the belly of the fish. But God did not put Jonah there simply to punish him. Nor did God put him there for a set period of time. God put Jonah in the belly of the fish so that Jonah would have a change of heart. Chapter 2 is a poem composed by Jonah from the belly of the fish and we see that he experienced a change of heart, which led to a change of behavior. When God commanded Jonah the second time to go to Nineveh, Jonah obeyed.
Perhaps something that is missing from the “time-out” method of discipline is this focus on encouraging the child to change his or her heart. Neither repentance nor humility come easily. They are not miraculous gifts or abilities; they do not drop out of heaven into the heart of a child (or adult for that matter!). Rather, they are choices that have to be made.
Giving your child time to think and change their heart can be a helpful and positive method of training your child. Rather than escalating a confrontation between the parent and the child, Mom or Dad can require the child to sit in the chair, perhaps in the corner, and think about what they have done or said. Mom and Dad can even stipulate that they can get up and rejoin the family once they have had a change of heart.
This “tweaking” of the time-out chair idea offers a couple of advantages to the other approach. It turns the method into a disciplining process rather than just a punitive process. It puts the focus on the child’s heart as it guides their behavior, rather than just the behavior itself. It also makes the time spent in the chair dependent on the child’s choice to humble himself or herself as opposed to an arbitrary time set by Mom and Dad. Of course, if the child comes back and has not humbled the heart, they can also be sent back.
Paul Holland
