America’s culture in the 21st century is very similar to the culture of Corinth in the first century. This is especially evident in the inordinate focus on sex. When Paul writes his letter to the Christians in Corinth, he has to discuss sexual immorality in chapter 5, chapter 6, and then again, in chapter 7. This chapter is the longest discussion of marriage and marriage-related questions in the NT. Notice the use of “wife/wives” (18x), “husband/s” (17x), “married” (9x) and “unmarried” (4x).
Chapter 7 begins with Paul addressing some questions that apparently were sent to him by way of Chloe or the family of Stephanus. He seems to be addressing their questions in 7:1, 25; 8:1, 4; 12:1; 16:1, 12. What seems to be the situation that stimulates this chapter is that some understood the body was separate from the spirit, so where does marriage and sex fit in with Christianity? You will notice that Paul’s emphasis throughout this chapter is: “Stay where you are” (especially note the use of the verb “remain”): 7:8, 10, 11-13 , 17-18, 20, 24, 27, 40.
In Paul’s first paragraph (7:1-7), he emphatically states that abstinence is not okay within the marriage relationship. That is, abstinence without a good reason is not healthy. A husband has a “duty” (a “debt”) to his wife, to use his body for her fulfillment and a wife does not have authority over her own body but has a duty to use her body for her husband’s fulfillment. It’s not “what do you owe me?” but “what do I owe you?” If we could reinsert humility into the husband and wife relationship, we would have fewer divorces.
So, no abstinence in marriage: “stop depriving one another!” Paul commands (7:5). There are three exceptions: if it is by mutual agreement, for a brief period of time, to pray. Otherwise, Satan will tempt one or the other in their lack of self-control. Perhaps that’s why some men were going to the cult prostitutes which we saw in chapter 6.
It is true that some people simply do not have a need for sexual fulfillment and do not have a desire to get married. Although it would have been an exception in the first century, Paul seems to have been single (cf. 9:5).
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In verses 8-9, Paul turns his attention to the “unmarried” and “widows.” It seems the “unmarried” refers to widowers because Paul usually addresses males and females as a pair. “Virgins” are addressed directly in verse 25. In verse 11, Paul uses the word to refer to women formerly married and in verse 34, it is used in contrast to virgins. So, it seems the word here refers to widowers. Both widowers and widows should remain as Paul is – single. Paul deals with widows and widowers also in Romans 7:2-3.
In verses 10-11, Paul reiterates the words and teachings of Jesus in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9: marriage can only be broken, and a second marriage entered, if the first spouse is guilty of sexual immorality. If the marriage is ended for some other reason, then the two individuals are to remain unmarried or be reconciled. That is, Paul is not giving another reason, besides sexual immorality, as a reason for divorce and remarriage.
To live cross-culturally, we need to respect the sanctity of marriage, for ourselves, our spouses, our children, and the broader society. Marriage is the foundation of society.
Paul Holland
