Jesus knows how strong a family bond can be but He is not teaching us to sever all family bond. He certainly wants us to love our family. We are commanded to honour and obey our parents (Eph 6:1-2). We are commanded to love our wives (Eph 5:25-28).
Yet, He also knows that there are many things in this life that can prevent us from loving God. For example, the love of the world can cause us to stop loving God (Matt 13:22). Demas, once a faithful disciple of Christ, loved the world and turned his back on God (2 Tim 4:10). Hence, our Lord warns us about loving the mammon of unrighteousness (Matt 6:24).
Relationships can also prevent us from following Christ. Some face parental objections from becoming a Christian. In such cases, Christ is looking at whether the newly-called child of God will stand firm, or waver, or even fall back and deny his faith. Does he love his parents more than Him? Would he listen to his parents’ advice and leave the faith to follow the religion of his parents?
Still, there is another greater obstacle to faith that is more difficult to overcome than parental objection. Today, at least in the society that we are living in, few face objections from their parents to become a Christian. But oftentimes, the young Christian has to make a choice when choosing a life partner. What if the person the Christian is dating does not believe in the God of the bible?
Young Christian men and ladies who are dating unbelievers and are madly in love with each other could not see the danger of such unequally yoked relationships have on their faith. What they know is they cannot live without each other. They have forgotten that they have been living well without each other and they will still survive, and in fact, better, without each other.
For a young Christian man or lady who truly loves God, the struggle to live with an unbelieving spouse is painful. He loves God but he also loves his wife. He has his Christian ethics to live by but his wife does not share the same and will sometimes do things that he frowns upon. He sees other church members coming together for worship as a loving family but he could not bring his children to worship. He wants to serve God but his unbelieving wife wants him. Before marriage, he has the desire that one day he would become an elder to serve the congregation but now he is not qualified. He could not open his house to hold fellowship with the members of the church because his wife is against it, and moreover, she has placed an idol altar in the living room.
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The saddest part is this: he has to live the rest of his forty or fifty years of his life in such agony. It is precisely the reason that I wrote in an earlier statement that he will still survive, and in fact, better, without each other. The pain of breaking up during the courtship is tremendously short when compared to the rest of his life living in a mixed marriage.
There is a cost to pay to become a disciple of Christ and so, Jesus urges those who would follow Him to consider the cost before becoming disciples (Luke 9:23). Commitment requires sacrifices and hardship is unavoidable: “Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution” (2 Tim 3:12).
Christ teaches us that we ought to love Him more than our own family, spouse or friends. There is a reason for doing so. The choice is actually between choosing eternal life in heaven or eternal damnation in hell. The devil wants to prevent us from going to heaven. He gets the person we love most to prevent us from reaching there. But Christ wants us to go to heaven and He warns us about listening to those whom we love who might prevent us from going there. The choice is deciding to live eternally with Christ in heaven or with the devil in eternal damnation.
Young men and ladies: make the right choice for after the wedding, there is no turning back. For eternity sake, you must let go of everything in this life that holds you back from following the Lord faithfully. “Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly.” (Deut 7:3-4).
Jimmy Lau
Psa 119:97 Oh how love I thy law! It is my meditation all the day.